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I can’t homeschool because I need my space
I’m always amused when I talk to many of the moms I know who aren’t homeschoolers. It’s like to their mind I am superwoman because I homeschool and am still relatively sane. I’m sure you’ve heard all of the reasons for not homeschooling, and here are my two reasons I almost didn’t homeschool:
I can’t homeschool because I need my space
I’m a bit of an introvert. I like my time to have quiet and peace. I like to immerse myself in a new book and not talk to anyone until I’ve finished it. I don’t want to share my food. I like to create projects for long periods of time and not worry about the needs of another human being.
These wants can work if you’ve got an introverted husband who also needs his space. He too will disappear and read his book for long periods of time or work obsessively on a computer game.
This does not work with young kids or homeschooling. It can lead to homeschooling bad habits.
But, there are two things I can think of to combat this:
1. Even if my kids were in school I would still not be allowed to read or just do anything I wanted, instead, I would be cleaning the house, working on things for church, or cooking. Yes, I would have more “free time,” but I would have other responsibilities because the kids were not home.
2. This is the more important reason. God uses my children to refine me. If I had my way I would sleep in until 10:00, then I’d spend 2 hours playing on the computer, and finally, I’d start slowly working on things that I should have been doing on my own. I’m naturally lazy. God does not intend for us to be lazy. All you have to do is read the book of Proverbs to see God’s views on laziness.
3. These children are my responsibility given to my by God. I am called to train them and disciple them. It is an awesome responsibility, and this is part of why we homeschool to train them up.
So, for me at least, God uses homeschooling to grow me and to help grow my kids.
I can’t homeschool because I’m a mess
Sadly this really is what my desk looks like. I am either insanely organized or not at all. This was probably my husband’s biggest concern when we talked about homeschooling. I have a tendency to get really excited about a project, get started, and then let it fall apart as the next big new project intrigues me. Yes, I am a bit ADD. Oh, look a chicken! (Future Ticia 2024 says I am now officially diagnosed ADHD, so yes, very ADHD)
But, I am growing from this. I have to be able to answer the question “What are we doing today?” I have to plan things. And that is slowly happening.
I’ve figured out how to make my disorganization work for me. I make general plans. I don’t plan for a certain day. My lesson plans don’t say on Monday I will cover pages 127-132. Instead, I broke down each subject into manageable bits and wrote down activities we could do to go with each day.
That works for us.
Slowly, I’m putting simple systems into place that are making all of us more organized. I’ve planned our meals for the week. I don’t usually stick to it, but it gives me something to go from.
I’ve started creating places to put things. With clear labels. Big huge labels. Now, I’m working on training the whole family to put stuff in those places. It’s slow. I have an entire family of anarchists, and most of them are right-brained creative people. Poor Jeff is the only analytic in the family. Everyone else is coming up with a project to do. It makes for a bit of creative chaos, but it all works out.
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22 responses to “I can’t homeschool because I need my space”
[…] I can’t homeschool because…I need my space. […]
Are we twins??? I don’t have ADD, but I get all this big ideas, start them, and then quickly fizzle. And I also love to spend time alone-just me and myself. But God has shown me and is showing me all the time it is not about me. Its about Him and His glory! Even in my failures.
Amen to that! I have about 3 half completed projects that I need to finish, and many of them are only 10 minutes more of work, but they still sit there.
Wow, your comment on God using your kids to refine you just jumped all over my toes! Thank you for that reminder. God definitely used you today. 🙂
Yeah! So glad to be of use. God is refining me today as my kids are squabbling and driving me to distraction. I told them to go outside for a bit, so I can calm down.
“God uses my children to refine me.” Ticia, you said it all in one sentence.
I love your post today.
Thank you.
Wonderful, wonderful post! You are so real and hit right to the core of these issues. And, you are so right. I agree with everything 100%. (Love the desk photo.)
I really want to claim it’s staged, but that would be a HUGE lie. But, this week is spring cleaning week, and I’m making HUGE progress in finding unseen areas of the house.
Two areas where God has been refining me as well, Ticia! I’m the exact same way with new projects. Thankfully, I’m married to Mr. Follow-Through-Who-Would-Never-Try-Anything-New. We counteract eachother beautifully. 🙂
I love how God so often gives us husbands who counter us perfectly. Thankfully Jeff keeps me from volunteering for everything. He’s my brakes, because otherwise I would be trying to do EVERYTHING!
Great post! Very real. I guess the cornerstone polishing goes on until we are in heaven and no longer need refining. I think the homeschool community needs people who can stand up and say what an imperfect job we ALL do, but also have the courage to know that that imperfection is ok, in fact it’s more than ok, it’s normal.
PS I’m currently typing with the keyboard on my lap as there is absolutely zip room on my desk top!I can’t homeschool because my husband doesn’t like the idea. Fortunately, I am happy with my kids’ schools, but I definitely envy homeschoolers the flexibility they have – and, actually, the extra time with their kids.
Now I understand why I resonate with what you write about so much, Ticia – I too am a disorganised ADD introvert! And sometimes I wonder if I homeschool just so I have an excuse not to get on with organising the house!
General, “go with the flow” plan work best around here too. And daily meditation – which my children sometimes remind me to go and do. (Cordie (9): “Mummy, I think it might be best if you go and meditate before you do Jasper’s maths.” :-D)
Great post!!!!!!! You and I have the same organization gene!!!!!!
Found your post via Pinterest and *ohmygoodness* YES! Love the reminder that God uses our children to refine us — what a *sweet* thing, that He’d allow those we love the most to help develop our characters? *LOVE* Him!
And the disorganization? That’s so.stinkin.me. Thank you for your honesty; I’m working through it, too. His strength is made perfect in my weakness, so eventually, this is going to be cause for celebration!
Thank you so much for this! Can’t wait to check out the rest of your blog!Hi there! Loved your honesty! Not many people will confess to being lazy!
I love that homeschooling my kids give me a good enough reason to actually do something worthwhile and productive with my day. Otherwise I would just read all day and procrastinate until it’s time to make dinner!!
🙂Thanks for this post, it really made me smile ;). I’ve been reading the others in the series & I’m loving them all. I can surely identify :).
It really was a great series and it encouraged me so much to read all of the posts.
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[…] Ticia from Adventures in Mommydom: I Can’t Homeschool Because I Need My Space […]
[…] I wanted to scream at them, “That’s what I thought too! I thought I could never homeschool. I’m a mess, incredibly disorganized, and I like my ‘me time.’” […]
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